Monday, Jun. 07, 2004 | 3:53 PM

All of this rah rah Reagan bullshit is making me want to vomit.

The man was a terrible president. He ignored the AIDS epidemic and allowed it to blossom into a major public health crisis. He illegally invaded central America. He illegally sold arms to other nations, cut much needed social programs, and began the great divide in this country between the haves and the have nots. I�m sorry that he suffered for years with Alzheimer�s, and I�m sorry for his family�s grief. But other than that, fuck him. He did major damage to this country and I�m not going to pretend otherwise.

Matt�s parents came to town this weekend. They took us out for dinner Saturday, out for lunch Sunday, and out for dinner Sunday as well. They are very nice and funny. His Mom especially I clicked with.

I know this diary has as of late turned into the chronicles of Matt, and I�m sorry about that because it�s probably drippy and boring as fuck to read. And I also know that everything I say sounds like such a clich�. But this is miraculous to me. It�s like being reborn.

On Friday we�re going away to Salem for the whole weekend and basically we�re going to spend it in bed. We�re going to make love again and again and have room service and watch movies, and talk and just do absolutely fucking nothing but live in our fantasy world together.

I never want to have sex with anyone else ever again. I can't get enough of him. It's great that we have the same appetite. We want the same things. I've never been with someone who's so completely sexually into me-- not even Ivy. And it's always so hott and so romantic-- every fucking time it's like becomnig one with the universe. And he's so complimentary and makes me feel so sexy and loved. It makes up for years of doubt hurt. Fuck doubt. And fuck hurt. We're so on the same page.

Afterwards we lie in bed together for hours and we listen to music and talk and make out and he's so not afraid and so not distant. He's perfect. And his mind-- dear God, his mind is a jewel. He says things that make me see life in entirely new ways. And after he says these brilliant profound things, he kisses me wildly and makes love to me and then he sings me songs he wrote about me

I still can't believe this is happening.

He wrote me a letter calling me his Arwen.

I love him so much.