Wednesday, Jan. 28, 2004 | 10:34 AM

Yesterday turned out to be a lovely lovely day. Just perfect.

My audition for Company went really well. It was the most relaxed and present I�d ever felt in the context of an audition and I definitely have my ART acting class to thank for that. And also Matt, who by simply allowing me to love him has forced me to get out of the way of my own ego.

After the audition I hightailed it over to meet Matt at his place and then go over to our very first band practice at Kara�s.

The three of us spent the first hour or so just talking about what we wanted�how we�re all sick of irony and sarcasm and misery. And Matt talked about wanting songwriting freedom and the room to try new things. We talked about all the other instrumentation we want to add and how we want an element of theatricality�that we want to dress up and such.. I�m so fucking sick of boring indie bands where everyone wears converse and thrift store t shirts. It�s so fucking 1992. Can we please move on? How much more do we need to distance ourselves from rockstardom? Is there actually anything wrong with being a rock star? I think not ladies and gents. We talked about The Mamas and the Papas and the Turtles and The Polyphonic Spree and Jefferson Airplane and Led Zep and The Flaming Lips and the elements in those bands we wanted to incorporate into our own experience.

During this time, Kara served muffins and her boyfriend served tea and it was all very sweet and homey. I got to have a whiskey and organic cola drink (no high fructose corn syrup) and I started to really relax and enjoy myself. Matt and I had been over the other night as well just to hang out and that had been a really nice time, so everyone was already pretty comfortable.

Anyway, after that we started off by playing a few covers. And again I was struck by how beautifully my voice blends with Matt�s voice. He is a killer singer. Just killer. And Kara actually has this really pretty high voice that adds a lot of color to the mix, so the three part harmonies are going to kick ass.

Then Matt played a bunch of his originals, which are so fucking good. And no I�m not just saying that because I am head over heels for him. He�s a helluva fucking songwriter. He wrote me a song too and it�s been stuck in my head ever since last night. He has a real appreciation for the entire rock cannon and does a killer job of drawing on disparate influences (a la Beck.)

Matt and I are going to be the lead singers in the band and our chemistry is just so hott and fucking visceral. I can�t wait til we start playing shows.

And watching Matt play�he just comes alive. This childlike joyous smile washes over his face and his eyes light up and his voice fills the room. He�s the antithesis of uptight and my heart goes crushy and I get blushy and stammery and I can�t believe that I fucking met this boy!!!!! And that we are in a band!!!! And Matt has actually been in a real band before (he just quit�they�d been together for like four or five years) and he�s been on tour and everything. And Kara has been in bands as well and knows her way around the Boston music scene. And everyone is really ambitious and ready to get a move on, so it�s not one of those bullshit enterprises that doesn�t pan out�I don�t think so anyway.

I have such a good fucking feeling about this. Such a good feeling.

We ended the (very late) evening by listening to bubblegum music (Tommy Roe, The Archies) and dancing around in the living room. Matt and I left to take the train home and when we got outside we just couldn�t stop smiling at each other. The whole thing�meeting him on the bus and becoming so close to him and then the manner in which Kara�s become involved (it�s another really good story I�ll save for another time)�it feels so destined. And the vibe is so clean and good.

Unfortunately, the rehearsal went so late that I wasn�t able to make it out for Josh�s birthday, but hopefully I shall be getting together with him and Debbie on Sunday night.

Tonight I am having dinner with Ivy. Yow!

Kids, I am really and truly so happy and I�ve never been this happy before. It�s amazing.