Tuesday, May. 27, 2003 | 3:19 PM

Oh humina humina.

I just spent the past two hours perusing the website of the Summer Stock thingie I�m going to try out for in March 2004. Oh man it�s intense. INTENSE. Hundreds of theatre professionals come to this venue in NYC and over a couple of days they see 700+ actors audition. Each audition lasts 90 seconds�that�s 90 seconds to sing a song and speak a monologue. The directors have stop watches!!! And then from that pool of 700 people, they cast their seasons.

Once you get a job, usually room and board is provided, plus a stipend ranging from 150-400 bucks per week.

While you�re there you are usually performing in one show at night while rehearsing a different show during the day. Throughout the season you might get to be in five or six different plays. Your day starts at around 10 AM and often goes until midnight.

It sounds like my dream come true.

Some seasons are four months long. Some are ten months. And anywhere in between. And you get to have all kinds of contacts and meet all sorts of people. Oh it�s so exciting.

So, for the next 10 months, I�m in heavy training. Gotta get totally in shape and tie up all the financial bullshit. Gotta learn how to dance and get in really good health (good-bye cigarettes.) Rack up another good role or two (please Longwood folks�do Company in the Fall!) By late March I�m going to be lean and prepared. And then I�m going to go in there and walk away with a killer fucking deal. And I am so excited I can hardly even sit still. Now I just have to access the motivation to keep myself going for ten months. I can do it, though. It�s scary but I have no doubt I�ll be able to pull this off.

I�ve got the fire in my belly.

In a few minutes it�s off the gym.