Thursday, May. 01, 2003 | 1:16 AM

Krike I�m sloshed. I mean, I�m fucking SLOSHED. And I haven�t written a sloshed diary entry in awhile, and fuckin �a�it�s about time.

Rehearsal tonight, was well.. it sucked. In a good way. In the Hello, the show is a week away kinda way, and here�s yer fuckin� wake up call.

Co-star was on Planet Mars. After yesterday�s insanely intense emotional togetherness he retreated and just wasn�t there for me. Our scenes were like plodding through quicksand. However, my second act scenes with Mr. Wonderful were fucking gold. Best I ever done �em. I wound up sobbing my fucking eyes out back stage after the last one, which was exactly where I needed to be. Mr. Wonderful is an outstanding fucking actor. Jesus H. Christ, dude. Grrrr�

Afterwards was The Good Life for many many MANY drinks. Hence my sloshiness. Great big conversation with Director. Of course I still love Co-Star ta death. But I�m annoyed at his general lack of focus today. Tomorrow Director will put the fear of god into him, and hopefully me as well. �Cause �cept for my last scenes with Mr. Wonderful, I sucked. I felt myself sucking the whole night. Like a great black hole at the center of my being making big slurpee sounds. Suck suck suck. It was just terrible.

The show has potential to be absolutely mesmerizing. And it could also just SUCK. Director is a phenomenon. I love her so much. And I think she�ll be able to bring us all together. I�m crossing my fingers�