February 04, 2003 | 2:27 PM

I�m feeling super dirty today and awesome and lusty and full of piss and vinegar.

�Know what? I have decided that the second half of my twenties is going to be devoted to having fun�not lame escapist fun, but experiencing everything amazing that life has to offer. I am going to have a great fucking time. I am going to sleep with lots of people and party and do theater and whatever the fuck I want to do. I am going to travel and have adventures and make love and throw cocktail parties and meet new friends and treasure the ones I have. I�m gonna drink and smoke and dance and kiss and sing.

When I think of all the time I ever wasted being upset or not recognizing that I am awesome, the world is awesome, my friends are awesome, and it�s just plain awesome to be alive, I am severely annoyed at myself. If you just get out of your own way, everything works out. It really does. When you do things you love to do, when you�re on the right path�and I don�t mean the moral path, or the path of least resistance, I mean just doing what you love�life turns into a fantastic adventure where anything can happen.

Fear is dumb. Limitations are dumb. Insecurity is dumb. Settling is dumb.

You know what�s not dumb?

Living it up. Being honest and sincere in every moment. Expressing love in its many forms. Standing your ground. Taking risks. Trusting your instincts.

Oh, and of course drinking good drinks, eating good food, smoking good grass.

God I am so fucking HAPPY right now.