Thursday, Sept. 02, 2004 | 1:41 AM

Oh dear GOD I am drunk right now. The Daily Show is very funny, except when John Stewart interviews people. He feeds them sugar cubes like they�re race horses. FUCK THAT. I know he wants to keep booking people on the show, but there is no need to soft pedle everything. However, the film clips are amazing.

I miss Matt. Dear God I didn�t know it was possible to miss someone so much. But I am not going to pine.

I hate being away from my life. And I hate thinking about things. In Boston I don�t think, I just DO. I�m busy all the time. I�m either at work or at band practice or at play rehearsal or with Matt. Here I�m home and I THINK and I feel fucking vulnerable ad I have memories and the memories suck. I wish I could black out everything that happened to me between the ages of 18 and 26. Painful garbage. Painful hurtful shit that I don�t like to think about ever and seldom do except when I�m HERE in suburban dull land with nothing to occupy my mind except that.