Tuesday, Dec. 09, 2003 | 10:40 AM

Last night I made out with Angus. I swore I wasn�t going to anymore, and when I swore it, I meant it. But yesterday I just couldn�t help it. He�s so damned cute. What the hell�s a girl supposed to do?

When I got home from work, Angus, Lynn and I spent many hours hanging out. Good, good times. Eventually Lynn went to bed and it was just me and Angus. I found myself becoming more and more attracted to him as the night wore on. I was about to leave his room and I turned to say good-bye. He had that sexy smirky smile on his face and his gaze held mine. I found myself dropping my bag and walking towards him and the next thing I knew we were making out.

Oh whatever. I am a free lady and I can fuck around with whomever I please.

It worries me though. Am I ever going to be able to be faithful to anyone ever again? Perhaps�if that person gives me frequent sex and is one hell of a good lover I might be able to.

I am having more fun now than I have ever had in my adult life. I love my living situation. I love my friends. I love meeting wonderful new people like the beautiful boy on the bus. I love my class. The only thing I don�t love is my job�I only kind of like it. But it�s better than most people�s jobs and I have no right to complain.

Everything is so different than it was a couple years ago. I can�t get over it. I appreciate it all so much.

AND�soon it will be Christmas. I love Christmas.

I�m going to have a fucking awesome 2004. Everything keeps getting better and better.