Saturday, Jun. 28, 2003 | 9:47 AM

I love Angus so fucking much.

He is, I think, the only person in my entire life whom I have weathered severe personal shit with, and come out OK. I feel like we�re war buddies or something. He stayed over last night and we talked for hours and hours and cuddled and it was so nice. I am happy about what our relationship has become. It�s definitely a major success story, considering that a year or so ago I was almost ready to never speak to him again.

In other news�

My taste in music lately is akin to that of the most stereotypically flaming homosexual man you can imagine. Judy Garland. Soft Cell. The Smiths. Magnetic Fields. I go through strange phases. My Robyn Hitchock and Sebadoh albums have not come off the shelf in a long time. I can�t bear to listen to them. Music is such a personal thing to me, always associated with memories of one type or another. I�m irritated with myself that I cannot listen to Robyn without getting upset�which is stupid, since I started listening to him in high school.

Ivy is away on vacation right now. Figures. I go away and she�s here. I�m here and she�s away. She�s coming over for dinner on Thursday. I�m already planning what to make. I�m thinking I might try to cook Indian�I�ve gotten a lot more daring in my culinary adventures.

Last summer was the most awful summer, hands down of my entire fucking life. I feel like I deserve to have a great time this summer. I�m going to do everything in my power to make that happen.