January 07, 2003 | 6:42 PM

Probably something you don�t know about me is that I love musicals. I really really REALLY love musicals. Not like, Andrew Llyod Webber or Rent or any of that crap. I love Sondheim. And Rogers and Hart. And Jules Styne. And Leonard Bernstein. And Irving Berling. Cole Porter. Gershwin. Kander and Ebb.

In fact, I performed in musicals from the time I was six years old�no joke. I think the reasons I didn�t make more of an effort to go into it as a career were twofold

1) Not thin enough (I know I know�stupid.)

2) Most people who dig musical theater just plain suck. Yeah, the gay musical theater boys are amazing usually. But the girls? Ug. Awful. I gravitated naturally towards the more existential indie rock crowd.

Still, in high school I played Mama Rose in Gypsy and Bloody Mary in South Pacific. And there�s about a million musicals I�d love to be in. I�ve been thinking more and more again about wanting to be in musicals. If you can believe this, I used to be a very very good dancer. I took tap, ballet and jazz for years, and still for all my weight and outashapedness am not too bad.

The reason I�m talking about this is �cause I just saw Chicago tonight. And omygod. IT WAS SO FUCKING GOOD. First of all, everyone could sing and dance. Even Richard Gere.

And Katherine Zeta-Jones was just phenomenal. Even Anne Reinking in her All That Jazz glory days doesn�t hold anything on Katherine, who I guess was a musical theater performer prior to becoming a movie star.

The dancing. The singing. The costumes.

It all brought stars to my eyes.

What I would love to do would be put on a musical review (Hey kids, I�ve got the Barn! Let�s put on a show!)

I know enough talented people to do it. It�s just a matter of getting organized. And everyone (including myself) is just too flighty and lazy to pull it together. But I�m going to look into it. See if I can�t figure something out. I think it would be a good time.