Wednesday, Dec. 10, 2003 | 2:42 PM

1) One thing I love about my friendship with Angus is the slam down bang up arguments we get into. Both of us can be pretty bombastic at times. Whereas others retreat, we go at each other like two angry jousting knights (pronounces kin-ig-itss). It�s a joy and a pleasure to be on a blood boiling rant and actually get interrupted by someone you love yelling, Can I get a fucking word in edgewise? This is one reason we are a match made in heaven. Fuck all y�all polite motherfuckers.

2) I thyink I�ve talked about this before but something that literally makes me fucking sick is stories about celebrities blowing millions of dollars in a single store. Can you imagine the kind of hubris that would allow someone to fork over a small fortune for hundreds of pairs of the same underwear each of which costs like 250 bucks because it�s sown by blind nuns and woven from the hair of albino Israeli children or some other such bullshit? I mean, who are these fucking people? Do they have their consciences removed when they get their tits pumped full of silicone?

3) We have to get Bush out of office. I hate to say this but I almost don�t care who the hell we replace him with. Soon, the dress code for his cabinet is going to change from Brooks Brothers suits and ties to brown shirts, jack boots, and swastika lapel pins. I say that on election day 2004, all of us blue states get together and sabotage the red states. Reset all their alarm clocks so they oversleep and can�t get to the voting booth. Put Drano in their grits. I don�t care what it takes. All of us liberals, jews, atheists, fags, debate club geeks, smack addicts, slackers, and rock stars need to take back our country from the fascists and the soccer moms. Let�s do it today people before Garth Brooks starts singing Deutchland Uber Alless at Mets games.

4) I am a pretty judgmental person. If you tell me that you find Friends totally hilarious or you like Matchbox 20, I will not sleep with you. End of story.

5) I had a dream last night that Angus and I got married and we had a child who turned out to be a piano prodigy.

6) I�m going to be performing for a gala fundraiser event for The Longwood Players on January 17th. I will be one of several featured singers and will be belting out a couple of numbers�not telling the titles, but trust me, they are hardcore showstoppers. The men are all going to be in tuxes and I have to get a goddamned evening gown (joy) I�ll get to be all diva�d out and shit, and then drink chocolate martinis at The Good Life afterwards. Pretty fucking sweet, eh? Anyway, if you are in the Boston area, you should definitely come see the damned thing and donate a few bucks to help a really good theatre company. Capiche?

7) You know, I think there�s a lot of good actors in Hollywood that are kind of stuck making crappy movies, and my feeling is it�s not based on bad judgement. There are definitely actors who probably get offered really good scripts but go for the money or the safest choice or whatever, but that�s not what I�m talking about. I�m talking about actors who get pigeonholed or who just aren�t given the chance to play the material that would bring out their inherent strengths. Like for instance, Kurt Russel is a fucking great actor. Don�t believe me? Watch Dark Blue, a mediocre film to be sure, but he is absolutely awesome in it. Or pay attention to his reaction shots throughout Big Trouble in Little China. He�s playing a very stereotypical character, but he does it with such specificity and such macho cluelessness. Seriously, I think his performance in that movie is a work of art. Another �star� who I think is probably a very good actor is Jason Priestley. No, I�m serious. Everyone else who was on 90210 (OK�except Hilary Swank) can suck a fuck. But I just have this feeling that Jason Priestly has a lot of depth and a far greater range than anyone will allow him to explore. He reminds me of the male version of Elizabeth Shue�a likeable actor whose affability diverts attention from other significant creative qualities. I would love to see Jason Priestley tackle something really meaty. Hell, Jared Leto isn�t stuck playing Jordan Cataloano for the rest of his natural life (although god love Jordan Catalano and everything having to do with My So Called Life. That show RULES.) If I ever get to direct movies, I�m going to pull a Tarantino and cast actors that the industry doesn�t seem to care about. And I�m going to start with Kurt Russell and Jason Priestley. And then I�ll move on to the entire cast of Mr. Show, and I want Ian McKellan to have a cameo even though he totally gets lots of good roles. But he just rocks my world. Seriously. Can you imagine having Ian fucking McKellen in your fucking movie? That guy is like, the greatest actor alive. AND he�s gay. AND British. Awesome. Totally, totally awesome.