February 05, 2003 | 3:47 PM

Today is boring boring BORING at work.

Things have been so exciting and fun lately that I am losing all tolerance for boredom.

You know what I want right now? I want a great big long kissing session in bed. That sounds so delightful. I love kissing so much that I ache for it. I�ve been doing some good kissing lately too. I love kissing different people because everyone has their own special style. I wanna have a big kissing party and all the guests could kiss each other for like ten minutes and then exchange partners. And clothing would stay on and there wouldn�t be any other hanky panky. Just kissing and kissing and kissing. That would be so hott.

You know what else I want? I wanna be slammed up against a wall and molested by a mysterious morally ambiguous boy. That would be really fun. And I�d love for it to happen really spontaneously and out of the blue. While I was poinned against the wall he would take off my shirt very very slowly, never taking his eyes from mine and he�d run his fingers slowly and lightly up and down my arms and he�d kiss my neck and then�

OK. I�m getting myself all worked up right now and I�m in my office so I can�t really do anything about it.

I feel so fucking romantic lately. Like at any moment an orchestra is going to burst into song and everyone around me will start waltzing-�didn�t that happen in the Fisher King? I feel all lusty rosy and my heart is aching with love and desire. But it�s weird because I don�t really feel that way about any one person�although there are so many people whom I love and am attracted to. I just feel that way about life. I feel beautiful. I am beautiful. Everyone is.

I have never felt more sure of anything in my whole life.