December 13, 2002 | 12:46 AM

I just watched Amelie for the first time.

And�

I dunno. It was a�ight, but nuthin super special.

Maybe it was the build up from everyone saying it was PERFECT. Or the fact that I love City of Lost Children so much.

It seemed so determined to be charming. Gritting its cute little teeth and pirouetting on pointe across its plot line in a Mary Quant meets Buzby Berkeley meets The Royal Tennenbaum perky daze for two hours..

I didn�t hate it or anything. I just didn�t think it was the hottest thing on legs.

I love the smell of apple vinegar. I�ve been gargling with it in desperate attempts to get my voice back and it is giving me a great deal of pleasure.

You know what I honestly don�t get? And I�m not saying this is bad or anything, just that I don�t understand. I don�t get people who jump from one relationship to another. Break up with a girl and then three days later another one�s on his arm and in his bed and he�s in love again (I�m not by the way, for all you gossip hounds, talking about anyone specific�I was just thinking about biography I read of Eva Le Gallienne which brings up this issue) How do people do this? I mean to me, a romantic relationship is so massive. It takes years to �get over� it.

I want to have a family.