February 21, 2002 | 11:50 AM

7G) ### Thurston Street

Madeline and Ben leave the apartment a complete and utter mess when they move out. It smells of cat piss and stale pot smoke. There is kitty litter scattered throughout every room, and a layer of pet hair covers the floor.

John is highly allergic to cats. Once I saw him pet a cat and the next day he woke up with his eye swollen shut. If a cat bit him, he would probably be in the hospital for days. That�s how allergic he is.

I spend two days straight on amphetamines, scouring the apartment from top to bottom. I wash the walls. I vacuum all the floors three times over, using the attachment to get into the corners. I scrub the kitchen and bathroom on my hands and knees until the linoleum gleams. All the while I listen to Madonna and Blondie and X-Ray-Specs and The Clash and Abba. The anticipation snaps and crackles in my speed fueled mind.

So when you're near me, darling can't you hear me S. O. S

Once the apartment is (relatively) free of cat hair, I give John the ok. Waiting for him to come over, I dance around the living room in faded boxers and a torn Tsunami t shirt, dirt caked on my face, greasy hair sticking to my sweat gleaming forehead.

When you're gone/ Though I try how can I carry on?

Hearing his footsteps coming up the stairs my heart swells.

This is the beginning of a brand new grown-up life together.

I picture this brand new life as a flowering of what had begun over the past year.

Yeah yeah�John will be working at the Stupid Company for a couple months while he �figures things out.� That�ll put a little strain on our relationship, but soon it�ll be over. And yeah, we�ll be living in close quarters with two roommates, but why would that be an issue? Our relationship has withstood worse than that, right? Everything will be just fine.

Just.

Fine.

I tell myself this again and again.

John arrives, his stuff in tow. His father and I help him carry it all up the stairs.

Oh, so much good stuff! A TV and a stereo and a rocking chair and a brand new rug for the living room and framed pictures and the Black Joe Juice Grapes collectible sign.

His dad hangs out and drinks a few Budweisers and does Dad things like open all the cabinets and doors and frown over cracks in the linoleum. John�s dad gives us cleaning supplies and tools and spackle and other neat souvenirs.

After awhile he leaves.

John and I kiss and hug and make love on the brand new rug. Later we sit on the porch drinking beer and watching the sun set over the city.

Ronnie and Penny won�t be here for another few days. We have this beautiful apartment all to ourselves. And I pretend this is what life from now on will be like.

I think now that I look back on it, that was the last time.

That was the very last time we were ever really and truly alone.

Stay tuned for part the Twenty-Fourth...

And should you be bored this weekend with nothing to do, cooped up in your house alone watching Dukes of Hazard re-runs while eating spaghetti-o�s out of the can, why not treat yerself to some sob-story shenanigans and read the whole god damned saga. Click HERE to begin.

I�m gonna be away for the weekend visiting my sister at the small, artsy Vermont college that Unemployed attended. So don�t expect an update from me until Monday. I�m on hiatus, baby.

So here�s a sneak preview of what happens during the upcoming season of O Brutal Youth: Anna�s Apartment Saga:

* Run-ins with a Jesus lovin� hick

* Bizarre Love Triangle(s)

* Sex, Drugs, and Rock �n� Roll in Boston�s most famous nightclubs

* The rise of The Stupid Company�s Evil Empire

* Many Many Surprises