January 18, 2002 | 10:37 AM

Do you know what I just realized? I haven't had sex since New Years Eve.

And you know what?

I don't care.

Maybe this doesn't sound like a big deal to you, but then you don't know me. In the top ten list of things I think about, sex usually rates #3.

And #2.

And #1.

If I don't have sex for a week, my IQ starts dropping. My heart beats irregularly. I have trouble walking in a straight line.

Apparently, these are all things of the past.

My libido is perhaps hibernating for the winter.

I like this. It's nice. It's nice to be free from desire.

Right on, Buddha!

Which drink are you?