December 25, 2001 | 11:45 PM

I just read a few diaries in the pro-life diary ring (This is the link if you're interested) I was kind of hoping that I would be proven wrong and that there might be one reasonably intelligent entry-- but alas, out of ten it was nothing but hicks and 15 year old virgins.

The thing is a lot of the time the stereotypes hold true. Pro-lifers are morons. I've never met a pro-lifer that I've liked or respected. And their arguments never ever hold any water. I hate it when I see those fuckers parading outside of Planned Parenthood Clinics. They certainly don't care about the kids after they're born, now do they?

And I know I'm going to get a lot of angry guestbook signings by saying this, but everything they say about the South is true. The South is like 40 years behind the rest of this country. There is nothing good about it (with a couple of minor exceptions-- Eudora Welty, Faulkner, Tenesee Williams), and anyone whom I've ever liked who grew up there hated it and couldn't wait to get the hell out. It is nothing but strip malls and the condederate flag and racism and folks with speech impediments.

You won't catch me below the mason dixon line. I can assure you of that, my friend.

Sweet home Alabama

Where the rednecks run the schools

(do de dee dee do do)

Sweet Home Alabama

Stringin' up the blacks and jews

(and the homos too)